Bellingham: Negative comments don’t affect me but I’d rather not read them. It’s an outdated view that I should shut up and endure it.

Real Madrid midfielder Bellingham recently shared his in-depth views on social media stress and mental health in his capacity as Lawrence Ambassador. He admitted that he had had moments of vulnerability and self-doubt, and called for a break with the outdated notion that athletes should just shut up and endure.

Bellingham's speech

When I was a young player playing for Birmingham City, I used to search my name on Twitter and read all the comments about me. But even though the reviews were positive, I quickly decided: Why would I let the opinions of people who didn't know me validate my own ideas? I believed I was a good player before I read these comments, so what's the point of reading other people's opinions? Of course, it would be counterproductive if I saw negative reviews. So, I asked myself again: Why am I putting my mental health through this?

For athletes, social media is extremely valuable in some ways. More and more people are interacting through social media rather than through press conferences and TV interviews. When you can be genuine and authentic with your fans, you can give them a very clear understanding of how you feel during a game or in your daily life. This helps bring each other closer. However, as I discovered in my youth, there are negative aspects to social media and I have now decided to avoid it, and I know many other athletes have made the same choice. There's enough negativity and stress in professional sports, there's no need to look for it. Now, when I read negative reviews, they don't bother me anymore, but I still prefer not to read them.

With the growth of social media and technology, there are more ways to attack others and make others feel bad, and I think there is still a stigma in society when it comes to talking about mental health. I know I had my moments where I felt vulnerable, doubted myself, and needed someone to talk to, but I tried to maintain that ‘I don’t need anyone’ macho athlete persona. The truth is, I, like everyone else, do need help. You will feel much better if you can talk about your feelings and emotions.

As athletes, we seem to have the world at our fingertips and can do whatever we want, make a lot of money, and never let it bother us. But the reality is that if we can show our vulnerability, we can start a wider conversation for those struggling in the dark. People like me in this position have a responsibility to be role models.

I still think that society’s view that athletes should just shut up and put up with it is an outdated view. The love the athletes get is amazing. But for every person who loves you, there are others who despise you because of the team you play for or something you’ve done. This kind of hatred can be very overwhelming for athletes, and I truly sympathize with those struggling with mental health issues. Everyone is entitled to an opinion about sports, but there should be limits on those horrific comments. I’m not quite sure how to do that on social media, but I think having a support network around athletes is so important.

In Madrid I have a very good support system, including coaches, players and staff, who I can talk to if I feel frustrated. Going forward, I think it is important to introduce psychological counseling into football. I've never been in a serious mental state, but I've been around people who have been, and it's sad to see them like that. I prefer to be the kind of partner my teammates can talk to about their mental health issues.

The most important thing is confidence. When you have confidence, you feel that you can always control everything. But when you lose confidence, you feel extremely low, as if your feet aren't working as they should and your body isn't working as they should. I believe there are ways to try and regain confidence, but confidence basically comes from performance, so it's almost a paradox.

I always try to keep my self-confidence high, whether it's through self-affirmation or accepting the fact that I can't complete every pass, beat every opponent, or win every game. The more comfortable you are with accepting this, the more comfortable you'll be with realizing that you're not perfect.

Football, and sports in a broader sense, naturally brings people together; it makes you want to talk to people, laugh, and get along; and then, suddenly, you realize that you have made a friend, and you have someone to talk to when things go wrong in your life. That’s the power of sport and one of the reasons I wanted to be a Laureus Ambassador. Lawrence understands the power of sport to transform people's physical and mental health and build a better society. I want to be part of it.